The Anime Reality

Hey guys, remember the LeetStreet Boys?

Who could forget?

Well, they’re back and eager to dispel any notion of them having gotten real jobs. Take a moment to listen to a song about how girls can also be delusional and obsessed nerds.

Some supernerd decided that buying a pre-made virtual girlfriend wasn’t good enough, so he made his own. Well, not fully. Miku Hatsune isn’t exactly an original creation, but a lovelorn guy’s gotta do what a lovelorn guy’s gotta do. Hey, at least she’s bigger than the desk-top version.

Make sure to watch to the very end, because you can’t have ultimate patheticness without a proper dose of ultimate creepiness.

This white guy found himself a Japanese girlfriend and is clearly living the dream. He recorded a video for her father, requesting his permission to ask for her hand in marriage. It starts out bland, then suddenly this fucker is swinging nunchucks and babbling in Japanese about ninjutsu. This is the best thing.

(Note: Enable CC for English subtitles.)

What do you mean I have to bathe!?

In the world of terrible anime fans, there are certain topics you know will almost always bring out gold. I’m talking about topics like: guns are dishonorable, swords are the ultimate weapon, various claims of made up abilities and skills, and, of course, girls only date jerks. One of these threads on animenewsnetwork led us to the discovery of Richard J. Richard is a simple man, who goes to college and desires nothing more than a girl that will love him unconditionally so he won’t have to bathe or learn social skills. When someone suggested most “nice guys” are really just passive-aggressive misogynists with social issues, Richard lept (waddled) into action!

Why won't women recognize that I am a special snowflake?

Let me explain this topic in anime terms.

I don't take my own gender nearly as seriously.

Why should he have to do things like talk to girls and talk about things other than anime? He held a door open for a girl once! I’m pretty sure that means he deserves at least two units of sex in compensation. Let’s take a look at his varied interests!

HOW UNUSUAL

Oh no! He didn’t mention his highly successful blog about loving English dubbed anime! Only he has provided a safe haven for anime fans that do not enjoy listening to the superior Japanese language. Anime is a lot better when you don’t have a language barrier preventing you from hearing out the cheesy and melodramatic dialogue. His blog tends to fulfill its purpose fairly well, discussing upcoming anime shows that are going to be English dubbed and released, nothing too offensive. Oh, he also posts tons of anime pictures with captions to make it look like the characters are talking to him.

A lonely heart

Delicious

This is healthy behavior

Hopefully, one day Richard J will meet his non-jerk loving girlfriend and live happily ever after.

This bloke seems like a typical delightfully dweeby dork, until he starts rambling about how he empathizes with the main character of Urusei Yatsura or whatever. Thanks to @vyabsley for the tip!

Don’t forget, you can tip us off through email or Twitter! Send us your tips!

This tweet from last week’s recap was so good we had to give it its own post.

Photo: So I drew my girlfriend in anime form. I guess I can still draw a little lol. She absolutely loved... http://t.co/HpmeW1Sm

September 17th, 2011 1:13 am via TumblrReplyRetweetFavorite

@Iakeem

George Williams

Here’s the drawing of his girlfriend again, for posterity.

This story is amazing for many reasons. First, look at his fucking face. And hair. Ridiculous. He looks like Yugioh ran out of hair gel.

Second, his name is Sir Wilfred Camalgian. COME ON.

Third, he imprisoned his girlfriend in his home and beat her with a stick and crowbar amongst other horrible physical abuses. Absolutely disgusting. Let’s hope he gets what he deserves. You know, on top of being arrested.

Here’s the money quote:

Sir Wilfred Camaligan, 22, corresponded with the 20-year-old woman over Facebook, and she moved into his home in Chicago’s Jefferson Park in July after they met in person at an anime convention.

Lesson learned: Never trust anyone you meet at anime conventions. Especially this guy.