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MY parents? Catch ME watching hentai? Heh.

by on November 4th, 2009 at 7:06 pm, under Text

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To answer the question about if my parents found out I watch hentai. No they haven’t. However, we are all Christians, in my family, so I’m sure if my parents found out, I’d be kicked out of the home so fast I wouldn’t know what happened. I’m 24, but my parent’s rules are “As long as you live in OUR home, you obey OUR rules. If you don’t like the rules, then GET OUT!”. Ok I’ll admit it, I’m a lazy bum who hasn’t gotten a job yet so my parents home is the only place I can stay, ’cause with no job I have no money to rent my own place. Instead of working, I spend all day playing video games, watching anime, using the internet, and RARELY also looking at hentai. I’m a Christian myself, but since hentai isn’t porn of real people, I really am not sure as to whether or not it’s actually a sin (but as I’ll explain later, it can still be harmful to one’s mind to view this crap). I know real porn is a sin though, so I stay WAY away from that crap. But I know my parents WOULD see hentai as a sin, and I would NEVER hear the end of it if they saw me looking at or fapping to (yes I do that sometimes) hentai. So I’m VERY SUPER secure about it. I’ve disabled the internet tracking software my parents have installed on my computer, so they’ll never find out. I disabled it from the services in the Windows control panel. They don’t even know about how to do that, so they’ll never be able to reenable it . And I’m VERY careful about when I go to hentai websites. I NEVER do it when I think that there is even the SLIGHTEST chance of being caught. I NEVER keep any on my harddrive or any other permanent media. I NEVER bookmark hentai websites in my browser. To find my hentai I ALWAYS use sites that I can easilly remember the URL of, like fapchan.org and lu.scio.us.

By the way, I didn’t even used to look at hentai. But one day at the video games room at my community college, some people I’d known for some time just up and asked me “have you ever had sex”? When I said “No, I haven’t. I’m saving sex for marriage, and I’m not married yet so I haven’t had sex yet. I’m a Christian, and that is the right way to handle sexuality, as it is a sin to have sex before marriage”, all they replied was “You are gay!”. So to prove I wasn’t gay, I looked up some hentai online (I wouldn’t look at real porn) and showed it to them (I had wireless internet on the laptop computer I brought to college). That was the FIRST time I had EVER seen ANY porn (hentai or real) in my life. I knew it existed because I’d heard of porno animes being mentioned on anime forums, but this was the FIRST time I ever had seen such a hentai, and DEFINITELY the first time I actively was looking for something pornographic. Sadly I found it powerfully addicting (just like I’ve heard that alcohol and drugs are). It came to the point that I just HAD to look at hentai WHENEVER I got the chance, or else like with going off drugs, I’d feel nervous and shaky like going through withdrawal from drugs, but this was anime-porno withdrawal not drugs withdrawal. So I had become addicted. This was bad, and even worse, anime porn stopped being enough (just like I’ve heard that with druggies, the weaker drugs stop being enough to get a high) so I started (unfortunately) looking at REAL porn on sites like 4chan.org and xxxstash.com. However my computer only lasted about a year after this before the video hardware in it gave out and it was a dead computer. I attribute this to God punishing me. After all, I’m a Christian, so my looking at real porn was like being a traitor to God. Now in order to prevent another attack of God’s wrath against my computer, I am limiting myself to ONLY hentai, NO real porn. And even with that, I’m trying to ween myself off of it, to the point I can go a WHOLE DAY without the urge to look at hentai. I want to break this addiction, and since hentai isn’t really a sin (or a low-level sin at least) then it is the the perfect way to get rid of the porn addiction. Just like a haroin user will go to a methadone clinic and use methadone instead of haroin, and then slowly take less and less of methadone until he is completely clean, that is what I’m doing here with hentai. I’m switching to hentai ONLY and then trying to watch less and less of it each day, until my porn addiction (even in the less bad form, known as hentai) is completely gone. However, sadly I may (just like any ex-addict, has relapses sometimes) still from time to time look at some hentai, even if I probably shouldn’t.

The real sad thing that this caused though is this. My exposure to such content has made me see women as just “sex objects”. I don’t think I can EVER (without the help of the Lord Almighty himself, and so far he seems to be just leaving it up to me to clean up the aftermath of my wrongdoing) again think purely of women. And that is the problem with porn in ANY form (even hentai). So to all you hentai forum viewers here at hongfire.com, let me tell you this. The more you look at hentai, the more your brain will be wrongly conditioned to see women as NOTHING MORE than just sex objects. Your thoughts about women will therefore ALWAYS be dirty. You will NEVER AGAIN be able to see women as other human beings who deserve to be treated right. You will ALWAYS think about having sex with women, and will NEVER again think of just having a conversation with them or taking them out to lunch or other such NON-sexual interactions. I know that this is how it will negatively affect you, as this is how it has ALREADY negatively affected my mind. So it doesn’t matter if my parents don’t catch me. God will see you, and might even ruin your computer for punishment. And even worse is the fact you will never again be able to see women in a pure, non-dirty, non-sexual way. If you fall to this evil addiction, you will ALWAYS see women entirely in a dirty sexual way. Remember this. I was a fool to get caught in the bad activity of looking at this kind of crap, known as hentai (and even worse, real porn). Let me tell you all, don’t follow the way of the fool as I have done (and am paying for it even to this day, with my mind UNABLE to see women in any way other than as sex objects), do what you know you should and STOP LOOKING AT ALL PORN, INCLUDING HENTAI! If you follow the path of wicked decadence as I so foolishly did, it won’t matter that your parents don’t find out. You’ll be hurting yourself by poisoning your mind. And harming oneself this way is worse than any punishment your parents could give you. Plus you’ll be dissapointing God, and he cares about all his creation, including you. Don’t turn away from God for selfish desires. Do what’s right and stop doing what’s wrong.

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